new cat behavior

It seems that my blog is doing better when I am not actually writing anything...Is this a hint, lovelies?

During my posting absence not only did I receive 2 blog awards from talented Nabby from This Old Life and generous Miss Dee from Of pearls and petticoats..., but I also gained 7 new followers. Thank you so much everybody for your kindness!

Now my absence was due for the most part to a very stressful period at work - remember that great job that  I started not so long ago?!...Yeah, right...Things are looking bright though, if only because I have a holiday coming soon. No money to go anywhere though, so I guess I'll spend more time with you :).

But I had other mishaps lately. At the end of February I found myself very brave and decided to walk into a hairdresser and have my hair cut. I hadn't steeped into a beauty parlor of its kind since 5 years ago, when I had a very traumatic experience. From gorgeous waist length hair I was left at the time with a poorly chopped shoulder length that made me 10 years older and took several other cuts to correct the terrible layering. Ever since, it 's been only my sister who cut my hair - she is a trained hairdresser - with the yearly frequency of my trips back to my country.  Of course that no cut will last a year, and this time around I was due one since about November. With old wounds more or less healed , I decided it was time to be an adult and do something about it.

Now you will find hard to believe this, but the history repeated.  In spite of me taking some precautions - in the sense that I tested the hairdresser's skills on my husband first, who also wanted a classic vintage haircut, and who pretty much obtained that and looks wonderful! When it came to me though, the nightmare returned: in with long, nearly waist length hair, out with badly cut shoulder length something. Not quite as awful as 5 years ago, but bad enough for me not to be able to face how I look in the mirror, let alone actually wearing it like that. I thought I was too old to cry anymore when coming out from the hairdresser's, but I was wrong.

So at the moment I am curling the life out of it and try and make it work, without much success so far. I am really tempted to have it cut shorter - I was contemplating a bob for little while now, with still enough curling length, something to be more sympathetic towards 30's fashions. But I am too scared to try anything, as there are plenty of things that could still go wrong, and the recovery would be a lot more difficult from a bob gone wrong than it will be from the present length.

To make matters worse, I fell in love with a dress. First sight, huge lust ! My size, velvet!!!, great color on me that I have been coveting for a while, and from a period that I am very much trying to buy into, with not much success so far because everything is in general outside my budget. My "wonderful" job pays very little, and in no case can sustain my taste. Story of my life that, with my taste being my only fortune, and yet at many a time is more of a curse.

Not the case now, as this wonderful creation was actually very attainable. But since last time I bought things in a hurry I ended up a little disappointed I wanted to clear a couple of things with the seller first. Of course the damned dress sold before they even had the chance to read my email!

I cried my heart out, and I am still upset beyond words. It would console me a little to think another person just like me got it  and will love it dearly, but part of me expects to see it again at 5 times the price in someone's shop! I suppose it's because that's what happened last time I had something snatched from under my nose like that, again while being under the process of actually acquiring the garment. I then saw it popping up again, but that time at a price as far beyond my reach as Mars is.

So now I keep whining and moaning and wailing about missing out again on something I wanted very very badly, and thinking that good things only happen to some, that beauty is only available to those who can afford it, and that everything has always got to go wrong in my life...there's no level of self pity that I can not reach. Once an acquaintance of mine said : "When your ship finally sails in, you'll be waiting at the airport".
At the losers terminal, that is.